Sorry About Your Weight

Years ago, I used to run the drive-thru at Hardee's. I used to do a little bit of everything at Hardee's. Cook. Run the front counter. Well, okay-- there was only so much you could do.

Despite what some may think, it wasn't a terrible job. I met my wife there.

I must have waited on thousands of people in my time on the drive-thru. I worked there for about three years starting at the end of August in 1994. Some 12 to 15 years later, one of the only customers I remember was this lady who yelled at me for taking too long.

On that particular day, we were short-handed. As I remember we had two people call in, and nobody to replace them. As we all know, mostly teenagers work those jobs. Instead of a crew of about six, we had four. The customers came anyway.

The yelling lady just happened to be behind this guy who had a $25 order. This was when combos were $3 to $4 a piece. It was a big order. And we were slammed.

She cussed me out. She had been in that lane for 15 minutes, and it was "ridiculous." I don't think I ever said anything to her. Her verbal assault was so impressive it stunned me into silence. I think she drove away before I has a chance to explain. Looking back, silence was the best response I could have come up with.

I hate long lines, myself. I've often thought it's a shame we have to spend so much of our lives waiting in one line or another. Like the one at the DMV. Or any line at a public restroom. And Christmas-time is no fun at Wal-Mart. Or Target. Or anywhere.

And I forgot amusement parks. In my opinion, no ride is worth a 45 minute wait.

Often, when a long-awaited movie or concert comes to town, fans will wait hours for the coveted tickets. Haven't we all seen the story on the news about the crazy Star Trek fans who waited 11 hours in line. That aint nothin'. I found an article in the Seattle Times about two sister who waited 11 days for the final Harry Potter book. Pride had something to do with it-- they wanted to beat someone else to the punch.

I was talking to my mom the other day about lines. She said she couldn't think of anything she'd wait in a long line for. She'd just leave, she said. Age has a way of not allowing us to put up with too much b.s.

When I worked at Hardee's, as a rule, if I felt someone had waited too long in line, I'd always apologize. I would say, "sorry about your wait." One day a really large lady was about to receive that phrase, but I bit my tongue.

Sometimes now when I wait in the drive-thru at McDonald's or Wendy's a teenager will say to me, "sorry about your wait." I'll laugh to myself, but I don't make a joke of it-- 'what am I, too fat?'

I'll just smile. "Don't worry about it. Have a good day." I'm really patient in drive-thrus.