End of year issue

The latest and last 2009 issue of the Community Free Press is now online and hitting stands throughout the area.

"Aren't you that paper at the Y?" Yes, we are. But, we are actually all over the place. Here is the list of places where you can pick us up (I don't think this is totally current, but it'll give you a good idea). It also may help to remember that we're at all the Walgreens in Springfield.

I think this issue turned out to be pretty solid. Fines landed the Andy's feature and I was able to talk to John Q. Hammons about his proposed hotel. This one was also fun because we got to do a two-page year-in-review. Yes, we are patting ourselves on the back a little, but I think its kinda cool nonetheless. It was definitely a reminder to me how very dependent we are on the people who take a few minutes out of their day to talk to us. Anyhoo, check it out.

Two sides of Christmas

My mother and father divorced each other when I was 8-years-old. Well, it was official two days before my 8th birthday, but just because I remember the date doesn't mean it was traumatic for me. Dad brought me a new bike the day he brought the papers to mom.

From 8 on, I always felt lucky to have two birthdays and two Christmases. Like I was getting away with something kids with one home didn't know about.

At 34, I'm pleased to say I have stayed close to both my parents. But, I suspect, whether one has parents still together or not, the things that mom's and dad's offer up as special holiday gifts are quite different.

Case in point: the following e-mail and video came from my mom and dad. Each in their own way, were trying to make my holidays more special. Both worked. Mom, wrote an emotional story about her Aunt Vonny that she sent to me and other relatives. The story truly stands on its own, apart from the Mom and Dad frame I've set for it here.

Mom's story

Just a quick note to tell all of you a little story about Aunt Vonny. Many times in my life, I have been so fortunate to have a friend or a relative do something so nice for me that the memory of what they did carried on for me and I still remember all of those special people. Aunt Vonny was one of them. I remember one time when I first moved to Springfield, Brian was 9 and Justin was 4. I was really broke and a little down about just life in general. I had talked to Vonny on the phone on occasion and she would sometimes send me a little note or a silly card. One time, just out of the blue, she called and said she had been praying and believed the Lord wanted her to do something for me. So for a few months, she sent me her tithing..her 10% that she normally gave to her church, she sent to me. I remember crying when I got her check and told her she didn't need to do that, but she wouldn't take no for an answer. When the time came, she called and said she felt it needed to go back to the church. I have never forgotten that act of kindness. I hadn't asked her for anything, but she felt she wanted to do something for me. When she died, I really wanted to go to her funeral, but the car I had at the time was really not in good shape and I was afraid to take it on the drive to Cape. I had told most of the family that I didn't think I could make it..I had visited Vonny in the hospital 2 weeks before and I rode out to Cape, I can't even remember who with? Maybe Ted? or Kenny? I don't know. So I told myself that since I just saw her, I didn't need to go to the funeral. The day before her funeral, a girl I worked with at the cable company came up to me and said she heard I wanted to go to my aunt's funeral but was concerned about my car. Her name is Darenda. I have lost touch with her. But on that day, she opened my hand and put her car keys in my hand and told me to take her car to the funeral and she would find a way to work while I was gone. She wouldn't take no for an answer. I remember at Vonny's funeral not wanting to go up to see Vonny in the casket and Aunt Bert grabbed my hand and said, "It will be ok." So I did and I think Vonny was once again helping me...someone else helped me so I could go to her funeral but I somehow think Vonny had her hand in it.....
So Merry Christmas to all of you and try to remember something special about someone this Christmas and then do something nice for someone else..even if they don't expect it!

Dad's video

Context

I had a journalism teacher who talked a lot about context. How it was important, why it was important. This article in the NYTimes does a great job of putting things in context. America is divided today in a way that is troubling to me. Something to think about as we head into Christmas.

Ozarks Christmas Village

Today is the first day of the Ozarks Christmas Village. The event features more than 50 booths with a variety of Christmas foods, holiday gifts, ornaments and other arts and crafts. It is being held at the Ozark Empire Fairgrounds from 5-9 p.m. today, tomorrow and Friday.

The event is the brain-child of Jeff Germann. But don't call that. Especially in his suit. He prefers to go by "Papa Santa."

I interviewed him last week for a "15 minutes with" piece at CFP's office. He truly was the best Santa Claus I've ever seen. His wardrobe was entirely handmade, complete with an overcoat that featured a nativity scene on the inside.

He was kind, and humble and, well, perfect. He said he wanted to start the Ozarks Christmas Village as a way to bring the community together. A way to celebrate the season as a real community apart from the corporate hullabaloo at the mall. Okay, some of that is me talking.

Anyway, he was a really cool guy and if you are wanting to do something Christmas-y with the kiddos during the next couple of days you should really check it out. It is free, but please bring a non-perishable food item or give a cash donation.

Get R done?

The long and windy road to health care reform takes many twists and turns. Here is where we are at right now.

If legislation doesn't get 60 votes in the Senate, it's likely dead. To make it pass, Dems are trying to make reform measures palatable to those on the fence. That means the bill is expected to morph and change.

Many Dems want a public option and see it as the only way to force health care prices down. But, if a public option survives, it's likely states will be able to opt of it. Or there will be a trigger. Meaning if rates don't drop by so much in a specified time frame, the public option kicks in.

For me, I want to see lower costs for real people. Period. If we get that from public option, then I am all for it. If it can only come from tort reform, okay. The bottom line is Republicans and Democrats need to work together to make this crap cheaper.

Have you been to the hospital lately? Me, neither. Last time it costs a couple thousand dollars. And I have insurance.

Chase is 14

My first-born turns 14-years-old today. His official name is Chase Alexander Brown, but he's gone by a variety of names over the years. Chasey. Chaser. Chasey-poo. Chaser-baser-big-boy. And Stinky.

When he was a baby, he was the laziest baby in the world. He loved just rocking in his car seat, and though we took him out quite a bit, he didn't seem to care too much. He was content wherever he was. He didn't walk until he was 18 months old. But, it worked out perfect for me. He was my introduction to the world of babies, and as it turned out, I couldn't screw up a thing. I was a success as a dad as long as I was around to make faces at him.

At 14, Chase is like me in almost every measurable way. Well, except for the Wilkinson blonde hair. He's smart, but not so smart that he's overly burdened. Lucky for me he got the ridiculously corny Brown sense of humor. I can joke with him about anything and he just gets it. When I start singing "All the Single Ladies" out of the blue, Chase is always there to join in.

He loves sports, and just like me at his age, he is always ready for a pick-up game of basketball or a quick football toss in the yard. He's not the fastest or strongest at anything, but he's competitive. Just like dad.

Chase is great because he rolls with the punches. He can get really upset of course, but he never holds onto it. That's a rare thing, you know.

He is funny. He's nice. He's laid back. He's a goofball.

In a mixed up confusing world, we understand each other. And I'm he's biggest fan. But, don't let him know.

Today, I'm going to take him to the court and play him one-on-one. I'm going to beat him down, and hopefully, make him cry a little. Then, I might sing him a song about how much it sucks to be a loser. He'll laugh.

Happy Birthday, Chasey.

Jackie's tough

According to updates from her husband and friends, it seems local blogger and former CFP politico Jackie Melton is making a recovery from a rather serious staph infection. Her husband, Larry Melton, said she had antibiotic staph pneumonia. She has been in the hospital for at least a couple of weeks now. Her last post was in mid-October.

Jackie became a friend of mine when I was still an intern at CFP. Her blog, Jackehammer, is widely followed and respected. She has covered City Council forever it seems, and usually not for money. She seems to know everyone involved in local politics, and she is probably the best researcher I have ever met. She has always been very helpful and kind to me and I am very glad to hear she is getting better.

Perception

I found this story about perception on Stumbleupon. This is the kind of dorky stuff I find interesting.

School bond bummer

I must now apologize to my younger self.

As one who attended Springfield Public Schools, I remember days staring at the chalk board and sweating in my chair. At certain times near the beginning and end of the school year, it was inescapable. The heat. On the hottest days, they'd let us bring our own water bottles.

Occasionally at Parkview, a wasp would fly in one of the seemingly thousands of open windows and terrorize the class while a distracted teacher would tell us to 'just ignore it.' We couldn't, of course.

I am sure I was not the only student who found it offensive that the only part of the school that was air-conditioned was the administrative offices. Rumors were that it was also air-conditioned in the teachers' lounge, but I never went in there.

I'm apologizing now because today I did something I never thought I'd do. I voted against air conditioning some Springfield Public Schools.

Here's the thing -- and I only learned this after reading Ralph Plank's letter to the editor -- two of the schools they want to air-condition, Reed and my alma mater Jarrett, are schools they want to tear down and build again. A look at current bond projects and future proposed projects reveals a disturbing pair of competing priorities.

While I am not as convinced as he seems to be that a new middle school at Westport is a bad thing, I don't quite understand why the school district is pressing forward with plans despite the objections of parents in that area. They say they'll save money consolidating the alternatives' programs, but I'm not sure why that's needed either. Obviously, the facilities are already in place.

Plus I'm bummed out that the district feels its necessary to move its administrative offices to a place its going to have to remodel anyway. Neither Gerry Lee nor Norm Ridder laid out strong arguments for the move when I interviewed them for my ballot story. And neither would say that's a permanent move.

I'm not someone who is against stimulus funds. In fact, I like that they were trying to take advantage of the available dollars. Dollars that won't be there if the bond measure fails. But I don't understand why the district is looking to air-condition schools that they want to tear down soon. And as Bob Mace points out (page 6 on the link), I don't like that the district is holding any events in University Plaza when the Doling building or any number of its other buildings is available.

I voted for the 2006 bond issue, but I couldn't bring myself to vote for this one. Perhaps if voters send a message to the district now, it will remember this is real money its playing with. Real money from property working adults buy after they work. Sorry kiddos. Take a water bottle.

Opinion: yes

For as much as I have said I wanted to be an opinion columnist, I’ve found I am oddly voiceless when I go to my blog to open my mouth on local issues. I want to offer my two cents, but I can’t help but hold back. I don’t want to alienate sources, and I don’t want to seem biased. However,I really don’t want to feed into the dated notion that journalist aren’t biased, either. Of course they are.

In full hillbilly voice I say: I is biased and so are everyone else. Real people run the world, and we can't let ourselves forget that. So, onward I march.

In my view, people don’t hate Fox News because there’s an obvious right-wing slant to much of their news programming (that’s why they love them). They hate Fox News because they’ll tell you what they're offering as news is “fair and balanced.” Just be honest, Fox. Tell people upfront your channel supports a conservative ideology. That's not such a terrible thing. Occasionally, I will hear our CFP ad guy compare us to Fox News when he’s trying to sell. It makes me cringe every time.

To get a sense of my own biases, please read my opening blog post.

I’m getting off point.

When I’m not using this blog as a creative outlet, I’d like to use it to express my own opinions about the stories I’m covering. At least every so often. I suspect that others like me may be hesitant to do this, and that's understandable. I believe other reporters have the same fears of perceived bias I have and so they shy away from taking a stand. In fact, the Society of Professional Journalists recommends reporters stay away from conflicts of interest "real or perceived."

But then newspapers have been writing editorials forever. I think the same code of ethics draws the line between news and opinion correctly: "Analysis and commentary should be labeled and not misrepresent fact or context."

Don’t get me wrong: we need objective reporting. People who are reading or watching news want facts to form their own opinions about important issues. I want others to be objective, too. And when I’m writing news for CFP, that’s what I’m doing. But here aint news. It’s beauty and fear and love and greed and something more honest. And by exposing that side of myself, I’m meeting the mission of this blog: to say something true about the human experience.

But why should my opinion matter, you may ask?

Ultimately, I know how I approach stories. I’m going in trying to learn what people need to know to make up their own minds. And if I wasn’t myself, I’d be interested in what I thought. So, for what it’s worth, I’m offering up my opinion on the story that won’t go away … please, take it more as a polite suggestion rather than the ramblings of a nut case who found a megaphone.

On Nov. 3 pension sales tax

My take: Vote yes, y’all.

Click here to read my story on the upcoming pension sales tax vote in the latest issue of CFP (Page 1 and Page 4).

I believe the cops and firefighters have tough jobs as it is. The city is responsible for their pension, and their pension is failing. You can blame the city if you like, but no one is served with a “no” vote. I agree with the citizens’ pension task force: the best way to fill this gap is with a sales tax. People from surrounding areas spend money in Springfield, thereby lessening the Springfield tax burden. It’s the quickest and easiest fix. Cutting benefits will likely result in a lawsuit. And the state can potentially take away tax revenues if the city doesn’t keep the fund at 60 percent of its actuarial value. It's at 46.5 percent now.

Many have expressed concern about the city’s wasteful spending. And that’s fine. Many have expressed concern about the ballot language not including a clear and obvious sunset-- including Bob Mace on Page 6. Okay. But a “no” vote only ignores the problem, and then the problem will only escalate. You can be mad at the sky for the storm, just don’t forget to fill the sandbags out of spite.

I voted for the 1-cent initiative in February, and I think that would have been a better and quicker way to address the issue. I do think the ballot language in this initiative should have called for a 90 percent funding goal, which would have been in-line with actuarial recommendations. However, that’s not enough of a reason for me to avoid the real issue. Police and firefighters deserve to not worry about their pensions. I’m sorry the stock market tanked on your 401(k), but as for me—and I am broke—I don’t mind pitching in an extra penny when I buy a candy bar. And don’t tell me it’s 75 cents when I buy a pizza because I don’t want to know.

I have the highest regard for Bob Mace, Jackie Melton and Fred Ellison. Each are intelligent and involved citizens whose opinions I hold in high regard. Each have said they're opposed to the tax. Mr. Ellison, if you are reading this, I thought you should know I didn't like the way the mayor spoke to you and others opposed to the sales tax. With all that said, I hope each of you change your minds and vote for this thing. I believe city leaders are trying to make this right, and we can pitch in.

After all, real people are running this city. People who answer calls for help in the middle of night. I hope we don't forget that Nov. 3.

Happy Birthday Mason

Look buddy, you are on the computer.

My son Mason is turning 7-years-old today. If you don't know Mason, you are really missing out because this kid is a crack-up. While each of my kids has a unique and fascinating combination of traits, the wheel of fortune gene swirl that resulted in Mason seemed to take most of the best ingredients his mother and I had to offer.

He has the devilish smirk of my dad and the trademark Wilkinson blonde hair. He has Valerie's fearless attitude, mixed with a healthy amount of daddy and grandma Kay-Kay's altruism. He is smart, handsome, funny, cool and caring. He has a love for people and traveling that is really contagious-- If you ask him where he'd like to go more than anywhere in the world he'd tell you a hotel with a pool. He's a ham for the camera, full of energy, and can become a loyal friend in 30 seconds or less. And if I haven't said it yet, this kid is funny. He loves knock-knock jokes that go off the script.

When Val and I found out she was pregnant with Mason it was hard for us because we were really broke at the time. Well, we are still broke today but we've got the best family in the world and it could not be what it is without him. I love him more than myself and I only hope I can become the father he thinks I am. He deserves all the best, and I am excited that today is all about him. Happy Birthday, buddy!

A bad word

In the latest issue of the Community Free Press I wrote a story about the upcoming Springfield R-12 bond initiative. The district wants to raise money for air conditioning and other projects by extending its debt service levy.

The district is also, as Jackie Melton points out, hoping to secure federal stimulus dollars, which will be added to the overall construction funds once the bond measure has passed. As Jackehammer notes in her post, that money is not guaranteed.

My story was one I worked hard on, struggled with, but felt good about. Unfortunately, it is not without error. You see, I found the mistake after being bothered by a word in the ballot language box and re-read the story. In the second paragraph of that box, it reads:

If this question is approved, the District’s debt service
levy is protected to remain unchanged at the current levy
of $0.51 per $100 of assessed valuation.

You can see the second paragraph of the actual ballot language on the sample ballot here. Do you see the mistake? I copied the ballot from a fax the County Clerk's office sent me before the ballot was online.

I wrote "protected to remain unchanged" when the actual language is "projected to remain unchanged." And I never caught it.

I want our readers and SPS to know that I regret this error. It was unintentional. I will make sure we run a correction in the next issue.

It's one word. One letter, actually. But it was wrong, and it does make a difference. I spent a lot of time on that article, and I hate thinking that any part of it could be wrong. I thought you should know.

Million Dollar Hollar

Sometimes I get excited by my own ideas. It happened with my candy cane utensils. Imagine edible forks and spoons. You could do hard chocolate, too. It happened with my menthol nasal spray. And now, it's happened again. What's the latest million-dollar idea, you ask? Personal fiction.

I tried calling invention services after both the menthol nasal spray and candy cane idea, but it turns out that inventing a revolutionary new product that reduces nasal swelling or transforms the way you gently sip holiday cider costs a lot of money.

Personal fiction. What is personal fiction? Well, it's only a potentially whole new genre of literature. For years, authors have been twiddling away their time and talents writing books for readers. Mostly bland ol' diddies. They've had to choose between writing made-up stories with made-up characters or serious and factual narratives based on reality. Fiction or non-fiction. What a bunch of followers.

Now, I declare a new day. Imagine if Joyce had written about being a soldier in the civil war. Or Fitzgerald had written about the excesses of wealth -- his excesses. Personal fiction is a new form of self-expression and exploration. I, Brian Brown, can write about traveling through a black hole as, that's right, Brian Brown. It is revolutionary.

You take one real you, and add imagination. What would you do if you met Jesus? WWYDIYMJ? What if you were a NASCAR driver and you were in a horrible accident? What would happen if you sprouted wings and could fly? Personal fiction.

This morning, with great excitement, I told my wife about my latest million-dollar idea. I just knew she'd get that big knowing smile and she'd tell me to get to work on it and we'd buy a house with a dog that's not crazy and a jacuzzi and a slide that went from the roof to the basement as soon as my book was published and eventually they'd have college courses like Personal Fiction 501 and I could pop in as a guest speaker and they'd all be amazed and I would tell them to leave class early and get busy imagining things and they'd give me high-fives except one nice girl who couldn't resist giving me a kiss on the cheek as she left and I'd blush.

My wife said "isn't that just fiction? I don't get it."

Sing, sing a song

We have this thing in our family where we try to say the lyrics to a song we all know as if they were just part of a normal conversation. It's pretty fun.

For example, my wife and kids like to listen to 96.5. Pop radio. I'm really more of a Q102 or US97 or NPR guy myself. But, I hear a lot of 96.5. And the other day when we were driving home, in the most normal voice I could muster, I said "Val, I never meant to start a war. You know, I never meant to hurt you. Don't even know what we're fighting for. Why does love always feel like a battlefield?"

The kids have caught on. Mason, 6, particularly likes it. This morning he said "Dad, I've got a feeling that tonight's gonna be a good night. Tonight's gonna be a good, good night."

Then earlier, just moments after a Geico commercial, he said "Dad, I always feel like somebody's watching me."

Happy Birthday Val!

I want to wish my wife a Happy 38th birthday today! If you met us together at a dinner party, which would never happen, she'd be the one by the one you'd be impressed by. I'd be the one staring at the forks.

She is funny and cool and not be messed with. She is probably the hardest worker I've ever known. At every job she has ever had, she outperforms everyone. She was the best cook at Hardee's; the best microfilmer at the microfilming place (I think that's what she did); the best CSM; the best department manager; and the best mom-- the kids wouldn't trade her for $1 million. Happy Birthday, Val! Here's to the best.

The wedding dance

I know I'm behind on this, but if you haven't seen the wedding dance video, you owe it to yourself to take a few minutes and watch it.

Check out "The Family"

Below is a link to a really interesting NPR piece about a book called The Family: The Secret Fundamentalism at the Heart of American Power, by author Jeff Sharlet.

The interview is about 20 minutes long, and I really thought the whole thing was fascinating. Click here for the link.

Another Story of Scott

Twice my little newspaper has done stories about a local guy named Scott Carlstrom that I never saw coming. Both articles have been inspiring tales of one man's will to survive in the face of difficult odds. Both have been incomplete.

The stories written by Mert Seaton and our new editor Dale McCurry were both well written. I didn't have a problem with either one. However, any good story is connected to many others. Each of those is just like a feather in a bigger chicken.

While I am always interested in the bigger chicken, what I want to write about here is simply another feather.

My wife, Valerie, grew up in a house across the street from "Scottie" Carlstrom. By all accounts (my wife, my sister-in-law's, Scott's mother), Val never made his young life, which sounded already rather difficult, very easy. It's safe to say she was a bit of a prankster.

Ryan Scott Carlstrom, now 34, has always had bad lungs. You see, he was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at the age of 6. Often, children with this genetic disease never make it to be adults. One hazard: they have to be careful of infections, for sure.

Val, who is nearly four years older than Scott, never cared too much about his situation. Not that she was heartless. She did what kids will do; she treated him like anyone else. With little abandon.

For example, as an occasional play-buddy, she said she once sold him "China dirt."

"But I sold lots of kids China dirt," she said.

As you might guess, my wife never went to China.

She said his parents hated her growing up. She was too old to be playing with Scott. She was too rough. And my wife said they would always keep an eye on her; tell on her any chance they got.

Last year, right around the time the first story ran in the Free Press, my wife and I stood in a voting line next to Scott's mother. She seemed tense around Valerie at first, but something about the years gone by had softened her. His mother talked to us both about Scott, his condition, and how mean my wife used to be-- always the tomboy, the trouble maker.

My wife, for her part, acknowledged her own reckless attitude. We all talked softly about Scott and his deteriorating condition; he was in my graduating class, and though he seemed short, skinny, and shy, I never knew how he struggled.

A few days later, while taking my kids over to my in-laws, Scott's father came up to me and shook my hand-- he wanted to thank me for Mert's article. I tried to explain that I had nothing to do with it, but he was thankful all the same.

In this issue, on page 19, our new editor reported the good news. Scott received his long-awaited double-lung transplant. He lived in St. Louis for months away from his wife, and family, and friends...waiting.

My wife told me that, as a child, she did feel sorry for Scott at times. Especially, after school. You see, she said Scott's dad would make him run everyday to strengthen his lungs. She said Scott would often look sad that he couldn't just play with the others.

According to cff.org, around 30,000 kids and adults have cystic fibrosis in America. Unfortunately, not everyone gets to live long enough to see a shot at the type of life-saving surgery Scott received.

Dale reported that Carlstrom said he felt he was within a couple of months of dying. His lung capacity had been as low as 17 percent of where it ought to be before the transplant. It's now said to be at 123 percent.

In the article, Scott said: "I now know that I was lucky to have had CF all my life. When people live the way I now do for 50 or 60 years and then are hit with a catastrophic disease, it must be terribly hard to adjust. That’s all I had known.”

While he has had two rejection incidents, it seems now that he is out of the woods. With a new pair of lungs, it appears Scott has the best part of his life in front of him.

His parents, who have dedicated their lives to the care of their oldest son, can hopefully enjoy what's remaining of their stories.

There's a lot of feathers out there. There's a lot of stories.

For now, what matters is Scott has a new lease on life. He's 34, and just beginning to live.

Get out there and live, my friend. Play in the dirt. Get outdoors and play, Scottie. It's time for you to play.

Post Town Hall Thoughts

KY3 reporter David Cantanese asked a question of Sen. Claire McCaskill after the town hall meeting yesterday: (paraphrasing) nobody who comes to these things ever seems to change their minds, so why do it-- what do you hope to get out of it?

She went on to say "we may not have convinced anyone... but it's still a really important part of this democracy."

In the post interviews behind the curtain at the Gillioz, she also said, "I learned its really important to make yourself available and accessible [to constituents]."

One of my friends on Facebook, a college-age counselor at a local church, said on his status "[He] would still disagree with Senator McCaskill on some of the substantive issues related to healthcare reform, but would now consider himself something of a fan; she was gracious, poised, thoughtful, and handled a difficult situation admirably. Kudos."

As someone down in the orchestra pit, I never got the sense that things were getting out of hand, but I did feel there was a real sense of anger in the air from those opposed to reform.

I can't help but wonder if McCaskill heard the angry voices as much as those who, like my friend, were listening heard her. The best arguments were all there for those who were looking.

Cantanese might have been wrong. I do think people on both sides were changed, even if only in subtle ways.

The Long Slow March

We know we are all dying.
The smart, the rich, the beautiful.
We know where this trail leads.
The dumb, the poor, the ugly.
And yet moments of clarity come.
One true God among the stars.
The sun warms us.
The breeze cools us.
The sick. The tired. The steady.
March on.

Pigs Rule!

Sometimes I get stuck on an idea, and I'll let it float around awhile until it becomes too big and ridiculous to sustain itself. For example, imagine there was only one type of tax. A sales tax. No property taxes or government fees of any sort. No income taxes. Just a sales tax. One flat tax. It's not really even an original idea, but follow me.

The tax could change from town to town, state to state, but from local governments on up the only legal form of taxation would be a sales tax. That's right, imagine no FICA. You'd have to outlaw exemptions to be fair. No tax breaks for anyone. No incentives, either. Not for the St. Louis Cardinals or Wal-Mart or James River Assembly. Not for anyone.

Any increase in taxes would have to be approved by voters. Legislators could decrease taxes, but only if they decreased them for everyone equally. Stick with me.

Here's the fun part: aside from the stuff we really want government for: national defense; the three branches of government; roads; and education, the government would provide basic needs for everyone. That's a lot you might say, but that's all. No postal service or social security or other stuff we don't need.

If you were poor or out of work or otherwise unable or unwilling (I know you don't want to, but you've got to include unwilling) to work you could have basic needs met such as food rations (three squares a day, and it doesn't have to be pretty as long as it sustains life), a basic home (something like the government housing projects we know and love), and health care (this can be good, but 3 free hospital visits per year, so make 'em count). That's it. If you don't want to work, you don't have to. But, you won't have money.

The government basics then-- as well as the other stuff-- would be provided by anyone who spends money. Or, in other words, people who worked. The people who work, even if they are poor, can buy what they can with their resources and know they're contributing to the larger national safety net.

Capitalism would still reign, but the wealth of the government would forever be tied to sales taxes. Who cares if the tax is 30 percent or more? Our basics are there if we need them, and the system would treat everyone the same. Have your freedom, and be as greedy as you want; it's good for the country.

Oh, and you'd have to be a citizen to get the government basics.

Under this fair, simple, and transparent system, trust would be restored to politicians, which would make them popular and well-liked by all.

Then we could let our leaders live in the big house. If they give a few special privileges to their friends every once in awhile, well, what would that hurt? When the leaders want or need to change the rules they can post a sign on the door for us workers to read.

Dang it! See, I always take it too far.

New CFP

The Aug. 26 issue of CFP is "chock-full" of good stuff. The "Seen and Heard" section turned out really well, I think. Kelsey Garman's story about Dr. Bill Hathaway was good. Lyle Foster, health care, MMA: there is something for everyone.

It occurs that our paper often has an unusual mix of stories. I like that we have Kelsey's more conservative columns and features balanced with a heavy dose of what's happening in the local arts' community.

I should note too, that it is sad for me to see Kara Hartfield leaving the paper. I guess she is still going to do some stuff from home every once in awhile, but I'm going to miss her throwing paper clips at me. It is a small cubicle, and Fines has some big shoes to fill. I mean sandals. :[

cool stuff

I know I've mentioned it before, but Stumbleupon is, in my opinion, a really neat website. For those who don't know, it is like a personalized google search engine for things you might think are cool on the Internet.

I decided to put a link up to my favorites page: www.donutb.stumbleupon.com. My "favorites" is a collection of sites that I marked as "I like it" for one reason or another. Even if you don't like me-- though I can't imagine why you'd be at my blog if you didn't, but whatever-- you might find some of the web pages funny or informative or entertaining. Anyway, check it out.

What's New in the 'Hood

New Editor

The Community Free Press has hired a new managing editor: Dale McCurry. McCurry, who is from Eureka Springs, Ark., officially took over for Chris Wrinkle on Aug. 14.

I personally feel bad for Mr. Wrinkle. In his short time at CFP, he proved himself to be a very level-headed and knowledgeable newsman and editor. He's a good guy, too. I hope he lands on his feet somewhere soon, and really anyone would be lucky to hire him.

It appears McCurry was on a short list of choices for M.E. after Mert Seaton left in December. McCurry has a background in producing special publications, something it seems CFP wants to do more of in the future.

While transitions like this are always kind of weird, McCurry seems to be a really cool guy and handling the situation very well, which has made things easier. He's written an introduction on the Viewpoints page of the upcoming issue and is already distinguishing himself as an inventive, creative and talented writer.

Heal Yo' Self Fool

I found a site that has folk remedies for all that stuff that's wrong with you. Check out Earthclinic.com. I recommend playing around on the Remedies and Ailments tabs.

Public Option, Co-ops, and All the Mess

Now is a really good time for people who want to learn more about healthcare to be getting their information from a variety of sources. There is a lot of confusion out there, and it can be hard to know what information you can trust.

Kaiser Health News, which is run by the non-partisan Kaiser Family Foundation, is one great resource. This story, which they ran yesterday, has links to several articles from major newspapers about the debate over the public option, as well as information about healthcare co-operatives.

Public Option Dying

It appears the president has backed off on healthcare. In a move that appears to be a signal to Republicans that he wants to work together, President Obama is now using language to suggest that lowering costs and competition is the key to reform. That likely means the public option, a government-run competitor, is dead when the House and Senate reconvene in September. Check out Politico.

A Poem

P.O.E.

The problem of evil is what to do with it.
If you could manage to capture it, then what do you do?
Do you seal it away and bury it in a safe?
Pay someone to keep an eye on it
On the other side of the County line?
Do you hunt for more?
Do you take a nap, drift and float in the breeze of
A cool fan? Close your eyes.
Ignore the pacing feet at the door.
Shine a light and look, watch how it runs.
Hope that it runs.
The problem of evil is confronting it.
To touch it is to lose.
Dirty men without shirts walking bold
Begging for a reason to be free, to attack.
Scaring soft girls. Hungry.
It’s a problem.

Big Brother, Uncle Sam Part III

There are two things that I have learned that I think others should know about health care reform: 1) there are several proposals floating around in the U.S. House and Senate, and 2) the early leader appears to be H.R. 3200, also known as the America's Affordable Health Choices Act of 2009.

That bill is the 1000+ page proposal you might have heard about. The big dog that couldn't be rushed through before the summer break. This measure, or any other, could change substantially before being voted on. The legislative process has a lot of potential twists and turns. At the moment, House DEMS are preparing the AAHCA to go to the floor in September. The bill has made it through three committees, or as House Majority Leader's Web site says, "the farthest comprehensive health reform effort has ever gotten."

The Kaiser Family Foundation, a non-partisan group that studies healthcare reform, has a side-by-side comparison of the major proposals and drafts introduced this year on its Web site. This is a particularly valuable tool for anyone wanting some basic information about the major proposals.

I recommend generating a more general comparison between the Senate Finance Committee's policy options, the Senate HELP plan, H.R. 3200 and Obama's 8 principals for reform. This will give you a sort of broad idea of what members of Congress are working on. But, you can be as specific as you want to be.

One thing that seems clear to me is that any comprehensive reform is likely to require all individuals to have health insurance. This will upset many, but will likely please those who are hard-pressed to find coverage.

Please feel free to use the links in this post as a reference tool, and share them with anyone who wants to learn more about health care reform.

What is Normal?

I found Warrior of Light's "Inventory of Normality" thanks to StumbleUpon. I thought it was interesting enough that I wanted to share it. Check it out.

Big Brother, Uncle Sam Part II

I'm on my lunchbreak at work, and I thought I'd post some information I found compiled by the National Coalition on Health Care. I'm putting together a story for CFP that looks at both sides of the Healthcare reform bills in Washington, and I am trying to learn everything I can.

I've been seeking non-partisan information, and, as you might imagine, that can be tricky. NCHC claims to be "rigorously non-partisan." I'm not sure if it is, but I do like that its honorary co-chairmen are former presidents George Bush and Jimmy Carter.

Here is what the group says about health insurance coverage.

Here is what it says about health insurance costs.

The long and the short is that many people are uninsured and healthcare costs are rising. What I like is that references are available, and I can double-check any information I'd use for the story. Many sites make claims, but don't back them up with sources.

Anyway, I thought I'd try to share what I was learning as I was learning it.

My Big Brother, Uncle Sam Part I

There are two political issues I want to learn a lot more about: government healthcare and corporate bailouts.

Like most people, I have my own feelings on the subjects, but I don't know a lot about either one.

For example, I am in favor of some type of government-run healthcare for the poor, children, elderly, and the uninsurable. I want to see a plan that reduces costs for everyone because if you have been to the hospital in the last ten years you know just how rediculously expensive it can be.

In a country run by "we the people," it seems like we ought to be able to work together on this to create a system that works for "we." I worry that partisan bickering in Washington will keep any meaningful change from happening.

It is my hope that our country's millions of compassionate Christians don't work so hard to defeat the plans floating around in the Senate and House without addressing the very real need of the working poor and uninsured.

I've heard that the two best ways to reduce costs is to increase competition among careproviders and put a cap limits on medical lawsuits, otherwise known as tort reform. This makes sense to me. But, I need to learn more.

As for corporate bailouts, I don't like them. I recently read Matthew Taibbi's "The Great American Bubble Machine," and I am hungry to learn more background. If you have an extra hour, you should read it for yourself; it's very well-written, and seems to have an appropriate level of moral outrage. If you have another extra hour, you should read the Columbia Journalism Review's "Don't Dismiss Taibbi." I've read both, and if you read them too, you'll understand why I am interested.

As I learn more, I'll try to post links here, so "we" can learn together. If you find things on your own, please feel free to send me links and I'll try to share them here. It will be just like school, only we'll care.

Keep an eye out for Part II.

political profile

I recently took a political profile quiz on Facebook, and it reminded me of a quiz I took when I was still a student at Missouri State. I found that old quiz on my former professor's Web site: Rhetorica.

While I had some issues with both quizzes-- a few times I said to myself, "well, it depends"-- the results of both surveys were almost identical. Turns out, I lean heavily libertarian (vs. an authoritarian govt. structure) and slightly liberal (vs. conservative). This is what I mean.

Click here to take the quiz for yourself. You might have thought you were a Republican or a Democrat all of your life, but never actually tested yourself on the issues. You may be surprised by your results.

The only downside to all of this is you might come away wondering why we are so dependant on either the REPS or DEMS. Then again, maybe you ought to wonder.

Sorry About Your Weight

Years ago, I used to run the drive-thru at Hardee's. I used to do a little bit of everything at Hardee's. Cook. Run the front counter. Well, okay-- there was only so much you could do.

Despite what some may think, it wasn't a terrible job. I met my wife there.

I must have waited on thousands of people in my time on the drive-thru. I worked there for about three years starting at the end of August in 1994. Some 12 to 15 years later, one of the only customers I remember was this lady who yelled at me for taking too long.

On that particular day, we were short-handed. As I remember we had two people call in, and nobody to replace them. As we all know, mostly teenagers work those jobs. Instead of a crew of about six, we had four. The customers came anyway.

The yelling lady just happened to be behind this guy who had a $25 order. This was when combos were $3 to $4 a piece. It was a big order. And we were slammed.

She cussed me out. She had been in that lane for 15 minutes, and it was "ridiculous." I don't think I ever said anything to her. Her verbal assault was so impressive it stunned me into silence. I think she drove away before I has a chance to explain. Looking back, silence was the best response I could have come up with.

I hate long lines, myself. I've often thought it's a shame we have to spend so much of our lives waiting in one line or another. Like the one at the DMV. Or any line at a public restroom. And Christmas-time is no fun at Wal-Mart. Or Target. Or anywhere.

And I forgot amusement parks. In my opinion, no ride is worth a 45 minute wait.

Often, when a long-awaited movie or concert comes to town, fans will wait hours for the coveted tickets. Haven't we all seen the story on the news about the crazy Star Trek fans who waited 11 hours in line. That aint nothin'. I found an article in the Seattle Times about two sister who waited 11 days for the final Harry Potter book. Pride had something to do with it-- they wanted to beat someone else to the punch.

I was talking to my mom the other day about lines. She said she couldn't think of anything she'd wait in a long line for. She'd just leave, she said. Age has a way of not allowing us to put up with too much b.s.

When I worked at Hardee's, as a rule, if I felt someone had waited too long in line, I'd always apologize. I would say, "sorry about your wait." One day a really large lady was about to receive that phrase, but I bit my tongue.

Sometimes now when I wait in the drive-thru at McDonald's or Wendy's a teenager will say to me, "sorry about your wait." I'll laugh to myself, but I don't make a joke of it-- 'what am I, too fat?'

I'll just smile. "Don't worry about it. Have a good day." I'm really patient in drive-thrus.

New Issue

Check out the latest issue of the Community Free Press. It continues to be a good little paper, and-- at the risk of sounding cheesy-- I am proud of my association with it.

Someone told me the other day that he always finds good stuff in there to read, which is a really high compliment coming from someone who isn't trying to suck-up.

Fines Massey took over the 'public defender' piece for me after I posted my take here, and delivered a very fine story. He is a solid writer, and a funny guy. I think we're lucky to have him on staff. I was glad to hear that things in the local office are getting better.

Kelsey Garman's 'Maturity Matters' story was interesting, too. So was... and on and on. It's a good issue. Enough said. No one here needs to read a sappy plug.

But then, that's all I had in mind.

Except for this: I am often dissatisfied with how much gets left out of any story I write. This isn't to say that Chris or anyone at CFP is doing anything wrong. The story lengths are good. The topics are fine, too. But, short of videotaping each interview, there is always good stuff that will be left out.

In doing the 'Animal Control' story on page 1, the audience wouldn't necessarily know that I rode around with Nicole Fowler, an animal control officer, for two hours last Thursday. I mention her only in the caption.

I thought it was interesting to know that she still gets attached to some of the dogs, cats, etc. she captures. Of course she would. Now when you consider the shelter has to euthanize over 2,000 animals a year...you can see how her story is interesting, too.

In a town of 150,000 people, stories are everywhere I guess.

Your okay, I'm okay

I ran over a bird the other day. I was turning left and he never saw it coming. Or she never saw it coming. I don't know how to tell what sex a bird is. It might have been a robin.

It landed in-line with my tire. I was turning left and going downhill. There was no time to react. I ran right over it.

That bird might have learned through its experiences to not trust cats. Or dogs. Or people holding big sticks. Or airplanes. It might not have been scared of dogs.

I don't know how birds feel about cars, in general. I would guess that they're not usually afraid of being run over. Considering they have wings. I think cats should have much more to worry about when it comes to automobiles. They have an attitude like they own they road.

I bet if that bird ever feared a car it feared the windshield. That seems like a more likely threat. I don't know if birds talk to each other, but I can imagine a mother bird telling its baby bird to beware of windshields.

I can see little gossip-birds talking to their co-workers on the wire. Talking about the dumb skunks that get run over. Or the squirrels. 'Dumb animals can't fly at all,' one might say. The others on the wire, chuckling and feeling superior. Except for one. The one who knows that anything is possible. He's quiet, but smiles to be nice.

After I ran over it I could see it laying there in my rear view mirror--its feathers sticking up. There is no doubt. I ran over that bird.

It seems that whatever that bird thought it knew about cars didn't matter much. How could it have ever known what was coming?

I told a couple people at work about it. There wasn't much they could say.

Guessing the News

So much of what we try to do at CFP, I try to do here, and journalists try to do everywhere can be called guessing the news.

In our latest issue at CFP, I wrote about College Station. I talked about the money that went into the new district, and I tried to talk to the people involved. Both, behind the scenes, and on the street.

In a story-idea meeting, we decided this was something ordinary people living in Springfield might care about. We were guessing.

The steps in guessing the news are pretty straightforward.

1. Take an inventory of what's going on.
2. Prioritize.

Often the process is influenced by what the gatekeepers-- those who set and change priorities like editors and publishers-- think their readership, their followers, their customers, even their advertisers, want to see in the final product. In fact, I said "often," but I can't think of a time when this isn't the case.

For example, this post came about after a follower of this blog sent me an e-mail asking about my own process for deciding what I write about, and what hits the cutting room floor-- a sort of early evaluation of my first couple of months as a blogger.

My first instinct was to resist this idea. I'm not sure I've been doing this long enough to matter, and (2) I'm not sure anyone other than Robert Stephens cares.

An aside: I'm flattered to have a Councilman reading my blog, but also, a little unnerved. As a journalist, and I believe Mr. Stephens knows this, I feel there needs to be a wall separating public servants and the press if the press is to truly serve the public. That means no buddy-buddies. We've had a friendly banter, and he's a nice guy, as a member of the public and follower of this blog I respect his input, but I hope he realizes I'm never going to have coffee with him.

Anyhoo, so, what do the unwashed masses want in a blog after all? And how do I decide? I asked myself, and I thought about it. I thought about my own process. My own audience. I thought about the sad sacks who might read this blog, the questionable flim-flams and lilly-livers who land here and stick, the pirates and voyeurs quietly watching beyond the screen, and I decided that more about the process was in order.

For me, I write about the types of things I want to see on the Internet. I imagine that the people reading this are both local and tired of the same old stuff. By same old stuff I mean the blogs that never seem to say anything, bland old diddies (spelling?) about the fam or a recent vacation. Well, I wrote about my vacation too, but more as a heads up-- 'hey, check this place out' (city museum).

I also write Thunderfire, which is similar to, but more awesome than, poetry. By posting it, I'm hoping to give you, the reader of ill-repute, something that is thought-provoking and unsucky. Often, poetry is so pretentious and caught up in admiring itself that only other poets can stand it.

In editorials or blogumns, I try to tap into my more serious side. The part of me that is, dare I say, interested in local politics and news coverage. Here is where I think we have a gaping hole, locally. I want to write columns that are, forgive me Fox, "fair and balanced." Springfield, in case you haven't noticed, doesn't have a columnist. Not a real one in any traditional sense. The News-Leader has a "from the left" and "from the right," but no Overstreet, and no middle-of-the-road, either. Which I think is a shame for a city of this size.

Oh sure, CFP has Bob Mace and Mert Seaton, who each, in their own way, are brilliant. But neither of them is the type of columnist I became impressed by in school. No NYT Sunday morning op-eds. No 3,000 + word novellas on elephant behavior after spending months in Africa. No real research or interviews. "No reporting" as Dr. Andrew Cline might say.

And myself, I have mostly failed at this in my short time as a blogger. Time constraints have stymied my efforts. As has a reluctance to try and interview others as a local blogger. Without the credibility or dedication of a Life of Jason, or the standing in the community of a daily paper backing my efforts, I admit to feeling sheepishly shy. Had I my own Web site with its own revenue, I tell myself, I would conquer the world with my ambition. An ambition, which I hope, is aiming to say something true about our human experience.

And that brings me back on topic-- how do I decide what I think you want to hear. How do I decide what you filthy delinquents, you dirty no-good gorillas, you depraved minnigans (minnies/hooligans) want to hear?

I look in the mirror, and I pick my spots. What else could I do?

The Case of the Mounting Cases

Public defenders in the state of Missouri are overwhelmed, and they are not going to get the relief they need anytime soon.

Last year I did a three-part series on our local justice system called "Justice Delayed." (Click here for Part I, Part II, or Part III) Locals leaders all seemed to be saying the same thing: the jail is overcrowded, judges are handling too many cases, and the public defenders are hopelessly understaffed.

This year, legislators passed a bill that attempted to address part of the problem by putting caps on the number of cases public defenders could handle. Once the limit is reached, the defense of people accused of low-level crimes would be contracted out to private attorneys. Governor Nixon just vetoed that bill.

According to today's News-Leader article, Nixon said putting caps only shifts the burden to others in the criminal justice system. Additional funding for the justice system as a whole is what's really needed.

The long and the short is: yes, we need more public defenders, but then we also need more judges, more jail space, and so on. Each part of the system feeds the other.

Public defenders seem to be lowest on the priority list, too. What incentive is there for the state to increase funding for the defenses of the people charged with state crimes?

And it's not just a local problem. Public defenders are stretched-too-thin across the country.

Here, there, and everywhere the issue is the same: either our criminal justice system needs to get bigger through additional funding or we have to start getting choosy about who we want to go to jail.

If the state or federal government makes a push for more jails, defenders and judges, the average citizen should wonder where the money is going to come from. It's got to come from other areas of the state budget, or from new taxes.

So, this was my thought: if raising taxes is not an option with voters, and I suspect it's not, then perhaps we should look at not filling our jails and prisons with drug offenders.

This seems like a good idea as drug laws are, by their very nature, unconstitutional. "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" should mean I can't tell you what to do with your body and authorities shouldn't govern the lives of consenting adults. As I mentioned in my original post though, for years I've been very conflicted over drug laws because I have seen at least one person's life change after a trip to jail.

Well, you may be wondering (as I was) just how many people are in jails or prisons for drugs, anyway?

According to the Department of Justice, in June of last year there were over 2.3 million people in federal or state prisons or in local jails. On average, local jails were running at 95 percent capacity.

In 2005, over 250,000 of the people in state prisons were drug offenders, which was roughly 20 percent of the total population. This number was actually slightly higher than the number of people incarcerated for property crimes. Violent crimes accounted for more than half of the total number of people in state prison.

What I found was that almost 1 percent of the total U.S. population is incarcerated. And, I think its safe to say roughly 1/5 of those are there for drug offenses.

When I spoke last year to the district defender of Springfield's public defender office, Rod Hackathorn, he said each attorney handles 150 to 180 at any given time. He said he'd like to see the caseload down to around 100 per defender.

If local numbers are like the national figures, then it seems that even a full-scale public groundswell movement to repeal our nation's drug laws wouldn't fix our public defender's problems. That's a shame.

For a moment, I thought I had an idea that could help.

Pain Relief Happens!

Ever curse when you stubbed your toe? Did it make you feel better?

According to research sited in this U.K. story, swearing can increase aggression levels and reduce feelings of physical pain.

Surfing Pro

Have you ever gotten online only to realize you really don't know what you are looking for? I know I have. I'll be drawn to the monitor as if by some magnetic pull only to realize there are only about four or five sites I ever regularly visit.

And it's frustrating, right? The Internet offers us endless possibilities it seems, a menu so large that we often dare to only eat what we have already tasted. Instead of surfing the Web, we end up just sticking our toes in the water.

Well, for me, that's changing.

Recently, I've discovered Stumbleupon. And at the risk of sounding like a pitch man, this site is a miracle cleanser. And so much more!

The idea is simple. You fill out a profile by selecting topics you think are interesting. You get your Login and password, and then you can start stumbling. Press the stumble button, and you'll go from one random Web site to another. Each of them fall within the general topics you've picked.

When you find a site you like, simply click the "I like it!" button and stumble will store it in your profile. I've just started, so there's only five sites I've picked so far. Generally, I like funny stuff the most. Like the poetry generator. Or the "how to tick people off" site.

In the weeks ahead, as I find things that I think are really fun, or informative, I'll call attention to them here.

Now when I get online I still won't know what I'm looking for, but I will at least know how to find it.

Happy Birthday!

Happy 9th Birthday Andrew!

Andrew is smart, goofy, curious, talented, and he wears his heart on his sleeve (which isn't a bad thing). I hope as he grows up and changes, he really never grows up or changes.

Andy, if you are reading this, you should know that your mother and I talked about it, and we decided to keep feeding you for a few more years. :]

MJ Dead, in 1986

According to an unnamed and imaginary source, the king of pop, Michael Jackson, did not die last week but passed away on January 08, 1986 due to complications from surgery nearly two years after he suffered second-degree burns while filming a soft drink commercial.

"America and the world is mourning him now, but the guy fans fell in love with died back in the 80s," said the imaginary source I will call P. Youngthing.

P. Youngthing said burns Jackson received during the filming of the infamous Pepsi commercial were much worse than the public ever knew, and eventually led to his death at the age of 27.

"You think Epic Records or Quincy Jones or the family were just gonna let him die-- it would have cost them millions," P. Youngthing said. "They propped up the best impersonator they could find, and that's the guy that died on June 25."

He added that he thought the longtime MJ fill-in was "a real d-bag."

P. Youngthing said he was a personal assistant to Jackson from 1981 to 1991. But, he said after the king of pop underwent reconstructive surgery in 1986, he was introduced to an all-together new Jackson by father Joe and a record executive.

"They said it was all going to be okay, and that this was the new Michael," P. Youngthing said. "I started asking questions because I knew it wasn't Michael, and Joe just gave me one of those looks like he was going to beat the crap out of me, so I shut up."

P. Youngthing said everything from "Bad" on was a total farce.

"There was just too much money to be made," he said. "When the new guy started getting really weird with the monkey and the sleeping chamber thing even Joe wanted to go public, but then Sony wanted to sign him and so nothing ever happened."

He said he still hopes those close to Jackson will "come clean" and tell the real truth someday.

"You think the real Michael Jackson would have slept with kids-- he could've had any girl in the world," P. Youngthing said. "It was the skin-bleaching freak who was the freak."

Darts and Heaven

One of my favorite teachers at Missouri State, Brian Shawver, said the goal of all great literature should be to say something true about the human experience. He drew a bullseye on the chalk board and called the center truth, or objective truth, or something. I remember the bullseye. The point was all great novels should be aiming for truth.

I just finished reading a book that seemed to have that aim. It’s called “The Lovely Bones,” by Alice Sebold. In fact, it’s the main reason I haven’t posted anything this week. I have a limited amount of free time, and this week I spent it reading.

A friend from St. Louis bought the book for my birthday. It’s really a heart-breaking story of a 14-year-old girl who was raped and murdered. She narrates from a sort of purgatory, an “In-Between” where she can watch her family and friends deal with the aftermath of her murder. It was very emotional.

It tended to use some indirect language at times, which was frustrating. Not a perfectly-centered hit, I suppose. But overall, it was really very good.

It was similar to an idea I’ve had for a book for years, tentatively called “Badges.” I was sort of unnerved by the similarities because I don’t think I could write it as well as Sebold wrote hers. In my story, people who have lived wear their life stories on their clothes, like badges. The ones with the most honorable badges are teachers to the troubled souls in this sort of In-Between place where the story is set. The teachers can still watch the living and use their experiences to help the troubled. The lost or troubled souls get a shot at redemption through reincarnation. Nobody leaves the In-Between world until all have been helped.

It’s a rough idea, and I haven’t worked it out enough internally to start writing it. I wonder now if it wouldn’t seem, from the reader's perspective, to steal from Sebold. Her book sold over 1 million copies, and is being turned into a movie. I suppose it is different enough, but I wouldn’t want to write something that came off as a not-as-good version of her story.

I found a study sited by www.livescience.com, which says that 76 percent of doctors said they believed in God and 59 percent believe in some sort of afterlife. This was a comforting statistic to me.

I’m not a religious person, but, like many doctors, I believe in some sort of life after death. If you have ever known someone you trust who has had a near-death experience, as I have, you’ve probably heard a story that is as hard not to believe as it is to understand.

People of all major religious faiths (an many minor ones, too) have claimed and tried to document their religious experiences. Atheists and skeptics talk about the God part of the brain as a reason for religious faith, and offer the process of the brain shutting itself down as an explanation for the light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel phenomenon.

Knowing what to believe isn't always easy, and I admit that I've struggled with my own faith and worldview as long as I can remember.

Contrary to much popular thought, I suspect that being right about the nature of things doesn’t matter much. In the end. If there is an end.

In a big mixed-up world, hitting the target squarely is hard. However, like Mr. Shawver said, we can control what we aim for.

Confessional

Since returning from St. Louis I have discovered that I'm a criminal. A transgressor against society. A law-breaker. And I just can't stop!

I have let my tags expire. And not by just a little bit either. The plates on our van expired in March.

What happened was I thought my car's tags were due to be updated in July. Last year, I knew I got the two-year tags for one of our vehicles, and I thought it was the van. But I was wrong.

What's really funny, or perhaps pathetic, is that even though I have driven care-free for three months, now that I know I'm breaking the law I feel like I am a paranoid mess every time I get in the van. I know the cops know I'm out there, and I secretly debate the pros and cons of driving on side streets-- I think I can blend into traffic more on the big streets, but then that's also where I'm more likely to see the police.

I should be able to get the vehicle legal with my next check, but we are just too broke for me to do it before then. Yes, every year I pay our property taxes when I need the new tags. This is maybe not the best system.

It would be easy for me to break off into a diatribe about how unfair it is that we should have to pay property taxes at all. Haven't we already paid taxes on our cars? But, out of guilt, I digress.

This time 'round I am going to have to pay taxes on three vehicles. The car we bought my step-son when he turned 16 has been broken down for a year now.

I'm trying to sell that car now, and have placed an add in the paper (CFP, of course). $250 or best offer. If I would have been smart, I would have sold the thing before January 1. I held onto it, thinking we might fix it with an unexpected $1,700 windfall. That dream has died.

If I sell it this week, just maybe, I can pay the taxes on it.

I guess I could go ahead and get my state inspection over with. I'm sure I will only have to go to four or five places to find a mechanic who has the time to give me one. I would like to go on and on about that, too. But, who wants to hear about a criminal's problems?

St. Louis

I'm back from St. Louis. I've been on vacation this week, and it was nice to get out of town. Val and the kids and I went up and stayed with my dad for a few days. We wanted to go to the zoo, but ended up doing something much more fun.

We went to the City Museum. The place was really cool. There were caves and tons of little tunnels and big long slides. It wasn't free (dad was kind enough to pay), but it was awesome and I think it was worth the money. My dad was saying that everything in the place was recycled-- I couldn't get the Web site up on my computer to read the "about us". It appeared to be-- old re-bar and metal of all shapes and sizes bent into things to climb on. It was a really cool place.

Vanishing Piece of Springfield

Popular Springfield blogger Jason Wert announced he will bring his site to a close today to focus on his work with an online ministry project tentatively called "The Prayer Channel."

"As I was praying and working tonight on the web aspect of a new ministry God has begun I knew that we’d reached the point where I didn’t have enough time between God, family and work to dedicate to continuing to run this site with same level of commitment" Wert said in what appears to be his final post as head of Life of Jason.

Wert recently won the 2009 Blogaroni for "Blog of the Year" at the Springfield Local Bloggers Association Awards ceremony. He also won "Best News Blog," "Best Local Coverage Blog," and "Blog Post of the Year."

I've only been aware of his site for about six months now, but it became clear to me quickly that he was one of this area's best reporters. In his "Thank You, Goodnight." post he thanked the past and present mayor, members of City Council and several other city officials for being open and available to him. In my opinion, the fact that he had so much to thank them for is a testament to his own effectiveness as a citizen journalist.

His coverage of City Council, his interviews in the last two (at least) election cycles and his personal take on the politics of the failure behind this session's Autism Bill (which was really great) all speak to his abilities, and the unique place his site has filled in the Springfield area.

Best of luck, Jason.

Little Black Box

Here's a new poem.

Little Black Box

I am:

System of a Down: Spiders
Beck: E pro
Beastie Boys: Sabotage
Lil' Wayne: Got Money
Outkast: Bombs Over Baghdad
Justin Timberlake: Love Stoned
Radio Head: Everything in its Place
Weezer: Say it Aint So
Tool: Undertow
Nine Inch Nails: The Perfect Drug
U2: A Sort of Homecoming
Lil' John: Snap Your Fingers


I still want to be:

Blind Melon, Pachelbel, Nickel Creek, Smashing Pumpkins, Pearl Jam.

I've seen you there God. I've felt you there.

To the father I pray, to the alter I bring. My own relationship. Our own conversation.

pathetic man

Okay, this has to be one of the funniest things I've ever read.

Welcome, The Water is Fine

I'm full of faults.

I have my own issues. I sometimes get angry too easily. I'm sometimes flighty, and I think I daydream too much. I haven't checked my credit score in awhile, but I'm pretty sure it stinks-- I've never been good with money. And I've probably just scratched the surface. So, I'm going to do my best to not sound self-righteous here.

But... I'm glad to see Becky Spence and the eminent domain issue finally getting some attention from the other local media outlets.

It's an important story. And its been a story for awhile now.

I understand that most people are busy with their own lives. They seldom have the energy or time to pay much attention to local government.

Reporters and media-types are busy too. Always running from one story to the next, hoping to get enough sources and hit deadlines.

But when the government or (in the unique case of Springfield) a city-owned company such as City Utilities begins taking away our rights or our property, we should all pay attention.

If its true that the media is the fourth estate and should be a watchdog of public officials, then where have you all been?

I've been hoping for weeks to see more play on this story, and I just haven't found it.

As someone who is trying to be objective and fair, I've been happy to talk to CU spokesperson Joel Alexander: (paraphrasing) 'we are still pursuing negotiations;' 'bus ridership is up since 1995.' But, as someone who attended Spence's hotel-plan meeting said, "when was the last time you saw a bus that was more than a quarter full?"

And really, who cares if her hotel is viable (though that adds an interesting element to the story)-- It's her land!

Serious questions still need to be asked of CU. How much would implementing a grid-system cost? How full are buses during peak hours? Why didn't someone review the findings of the feasibility study and see that the "fatal flaw" (page 54)in sites 2A, 2B, and 3 (city-owned) was that they would take away downtown parking when two new parking garages where being put up in the middle of downtown? I missed the last one myself-- but, I asked on Tuesday. Joel said he'd get back to me. He didn't. But now it doesn't matter. CU announced Wednesday it is looking into city-owned properties again.

When issues like these pop up, we all need to pitch and be a set of eyes.

City Council members did the right thing by questioning CU's plans to use eminent domain. They were right to get involved. They know the city has other properties to build an unnecessary bus station on.

I hope others stay on this story now that they've picked it up. Please don't just leave it to me. I've got my own issues.

It's Wakey, Wakey Time

I have to get up and get going today because there is a lot on to be excited about.

For one thing, Becky Spence is holding her public meeting today. Check out the 6-03 issue of the Community Free Press to see what I'm talking about. I think this issue turned out really well. Kara's "15 minutes with" Tom Prater and Bob Mace's "Hot Air" are big highlights. Though I won't tell either of them. Mace, in particular, already knows how great he is.

For second, its the kids last day of school. For me, that means no more waking up at 6 to take my wife to work. My step-son has been driving my car to school so that he can pick up his younger brothers, and then his mother, in the afternoons. So, post-today begins a new routine. That's right, I can sleep until 7 or 7:30 if I want now.

For three, Coach Wade talks. I just found the story on the News-Leader Web site, and am not sure I could be more excited. The former SBU coach talks about his humbling (it seems like he said the word "humbled" like 100 times) Survivor experience.

Survivor is one of the all-time great shows, so the Wade interview was required reading for me. Matt Baker did a good job on the article. I only wish he would have held Wade to the fire a bit more about lying on the show. We all saw it, Coach. Sierra knows, and so do the rest of us. Coach is still the victim, of course. But, it was good to see that he seems to be knocked down a peg or two.

Wakey, Wakey. The sun is shining, y'all.

Nightmare Hippie Girl

There is an old song by Beck called "Nightmare Hippie Girl." I always liked the song and sort of had it in mind when I wrote this back at Missouri State.


She Doesn’t Like Labels

All these nouns are killing me, she said.
She likes to fly around the sun.
People, places and things have
always let her down, she said.
Taco, paper, toilet, planner.
Use them, eat them, use them, please.
More plentiful than icebergs.
More sad than biology frogs, floating.
What can a noun do?
I want to do something, she said.
Be a comet with an icy tail.
Take your world and your things, she said.
Put them in a pill. Understand them.
I’m not what I was or what I will be, she said.
It’s not the world for her.
She dreams of stars and stares at them
when they buzz by, trying to understand—
salesman, tech-writers, marketers, men.

An Evening Among Lovers

The original name for the following poem was "An Evening Among Lovers." I changed it along the way somewhere.


A Dream of the Lost

Jumping the curb in a dream,
We were running through city fields.
I could see the pool hall, a dirty church, and
14 shifty-eyed cars passing us.
We were lovers in a lost land,
like Lassie looking for Timmy.

We were looking for a home, hoping to be
in His presence, where we’d be safe and fearless,
next to crown-wearers, generals, champions--
some double-chocolate fattening place.

I felt this leering anonymous
on our curious date. Our long shadows
were more real than now. Were we
protected then? Is He waiting for us still?

An evening among lovers,
searching for a place in the dark,
laughing while we ran.
Barking, just over the hill,
we’re coming Timmy.
We’re coming home.

This is A 'Merica

As someone who has never served my country, I know I feel extremely grateful for the men and women who have.

I am able to write this blog, vote for whomever I chose, start my own business, pick my nose and generally blaze my own trail because others have defended the cause of freedom.

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness...that's what its all about.

Recently, I was glad to see that our state legislators passed a helmet-law, which our governor is expected to sign. The bill would allow motorcycle riders over the age of 21 to chose to ride helmet-free.

People already make that choice, of course. I should say, if the governor signs the bill, the state agrees not to punish those bikers who will choose to ride without helmets. Those over 21, anyway. Oh, and those not on the interstates. Oh, and only for five years.

While I think this is a good move, I think its only a small step in what I hope is a larger movement to reclaim our civil liberties.

Let's take a closer look at the above-mentioned bill. First off, let's call it what it is-- a temporary repeal of law. In five years old helmet regulations go back into effect unless another measure is passed.

Second-off(?), what exactly is the teeth in this thing anyway? Read the bill for yourself, the repeal exempts riders from what exactly?

Any person twenty-one years of age or older operating or riding as a passenger on any motorcycle or motortricycle without protective headgear upon an interstate highway shall be guilty of an infraction for which a fine not to exceed twenty-five dollars may be imposed.

To be fair, I have to say, if convicted, a person would be guilty of a Class A misdemeanor. For a third violation, a person would be guilty of a Class D felony.

Now, there are a couple ways to look at this. If you get caught riding without a helmet, you get a slap on the wrist. 'Shame on you. Wear your helmet,' the state says. The law the governor is hopefully going to sign eliminates the slap. For five years.

Another way to view this is as the most ridiculous, unnecessary insult to our civil liberties-- ever.

What could be a more effective incentive for wearing a helmet than, oh I don't know, not having your brains splattered on the road?!?

This Memorial Day, I hope people take a moment to think about what freedom really means. To me, it means taking personal responsibility for your own actions. It means freedom of expression, it means religious freedom, and much more.

If there was a law passed against pink hair, I think people would be outraged. Can you imagine what people would say? The arguments they'd construct against the unnecessary governmental intrusion into their lives. Now use those same arguments against helmet laws, seat-belt laws or laws against recreational drug use.

Real freedom comes with risks. It should be our job as citizens to tell friends and neighbors to not be dumb-asses-- 'wear your helmet, for the love of god; don't put that into your body, what are you thinking?;' and so on.

If we hand those jobs over to legislators, they'll just tell you a $25 fine will do.

And then we all lose something more valuable than any one life. And too many veterans' families know what I'm talking about.

Lunch Update

I felt very encouraged to receive a phone call from Mrs. Spence this morning. She said she read the article and felt it was very fair.

While the article was not designed to please her, it's not unusual for me to have that lingering fear that I got something wrong. And I did sort of expect to have to defend my reasoning for diving into her history with local leaders. Luckily, she seemed to get it.

I know she had reservations about me putting her story in a negative light and it hampering her negotiations with CU. I just tried to tell it like it was, and let people decide for themselves whether they believe and/or sympathize with her or not.

The bottom line is this proposal is a big story. Can she pull it off? Will a new City Council and mayor want to work with her? Will this amp up pressure on CU to cooperate with her on the bus station plans or look at another location altogether and allow her to develop her property as she sees fit? Time will tell.

I'm just encouraged that she chose to speak with us and felt the story we did was fair.

The New Issue

Please check out the latest issue of the Community Free Press. It's hitting stands now, and is up on the Web site. To download it, just click on the newspaper icon (on the right).

There's a lot of good stuff in this issue, so check it out.

As for me, I've got Becky Spence on the brain.

I'm curious to see if other local media (other than Jericho) will do more with this story. I know that she has been avoiding the press, but I don't think she can hold out much longer if her plans for a new hotel are to progress.

She said she was willing to talk to me because she believes she can trust CFP. I hope she still feels the same after reading my article.

I know it was nice to meet her, and hear her side of things. But, I also believe I know how she wanted me to frame the story-- and I didn't exactly behave.

When I sat down with her on May 11, we talked for about two hours. About an hour of that conversation was recorded. She spoke at length after I originally thought the interview was over. Of course, I just kept taking notes.

There's a long history there, and I did talk about her side of things in the article. I think she would have preferred that I not discuss the history at all right now. She seemed set on having her plans taken seriously. But, the majority of the interview she talked about her history with the city-- why she felt her Arbor Hotel was ordered torn down; The problems she faced with her proposal at the former proposed arena site, and so on.

I felt to be fair to my readers I had to tell the real story. Which includes some history from her point of view.

Of course, the news at the moment is the hotel plans. So, I hope the story maintained its focus, but still was able to get at least some of her side out there. In the end, my obligation is to the reader-- not the interviewee.

I've read the story a couple of times now that it's in print, and it still seems fair to me.

Like I said, I enjoyed meeting her. She has a story to tell, and she really does seem determined to get this thing built.

Now, I'm interested to see if CU keeps pursuing this property. At what point does the city decide its not worth the hassle anymore? I'm sure no one wants to appear as if they are discouraging economic development in the middle of a recession.

And it's fair to wonder if is she capable of pulling this thing off even if the city cooperates. It's a large project. Lord knows developers have promised the city things before.

Regardless, I'm anxious to see what happens. Spence has put the ball back in the city's court. Now, what will they do with it?

Who knew local politics were, dare I say, interesting?

on the streets

In our city there are couches on porches
and sloping lawns next to parks.
There are yellow-haired boys
who shoot balls in hoops.
There are many who smile at strangers.
There are old men wandering the streets
and people throwing parties behind gates.
There is frozen yogurt and warm salted pretzels.
In our city, there are women in pajamas
and men who have killed others.
In our city, many feel devoted to others.
There are robins and eggs and rocking chairs.
In our city, there are priests praying
for all the souls in our city.
There are people who feel they don't belong.
There are millions of bricks
and poop flows through pipes.
There are grandmas who bake without measuring.
There are people who love to pull weeds.
There are people who work and are honest
and give to charity and its more than they'd tell you.
There are tinted windows and wedding gowns.
There are people who hate themselves.
There are loyal dogs on chains. The cats are each curious.
In our city, many march toward death with dignity
as shadows rise and fall from west to east.

What is romantic?

This is something I wrote about my wife for one of my poetry classes at Missouri State. I can't remember now, but it seems like the assignment was to try and write a romantic poem. It could be that I just wanted to write something about my wife.

I don't really like all the traditional notions of what it means to be romantic: flowers, candy, actually listening to what the other person is saying-- things like that. I've already said too much.

Anyway, I had forgotten I wrote this. And it is one I like.

Listening

I look through silk petals pushed upwards somehow.
They’re cut above the root as is custom.
I buy a typed note on 60-pound cardstock, glossy.
Finding a match means I love you.
I sort through crocodiles and loopy serif types.

Can I take you to a dinner I won’t prepare,
pull back your chair, order in your place?
I’d rather not hear you tonight.
I want to sit on our bed as
I watch your mouth move.
I want to know that you’re talking as
I let the world buzz in over my ears.
I want to watch you as I can’t hear a word.

Priorities

I'm not sure how much time I can devote to being a goofy blogger. I've wanted to do columns and shorts and funnies and thunderfire, but there is only so much time in the day. My goal was to write a lot of little things, and do one good blogumn a week. But, I've gotta scale that back.

This should be a fun thing, and not something I'm going to commit x amount of hours to no matter what.

If you've been reading this and you like what you've seen so far, then don't stop checking it out. There will be more of the same coming. And a lot more that I haven't gotten to yet. But, I probably won't be posting everyday.

Any-who, here is a little something I wrote awhile back. I think it's funny.

Saturday with Tupac and Freckles

1 7-foot flex-steel rod, rated for 10-60 lb line,
Sensitive, but fast action tip--borrowed.
1 12 pack--Natural Lights--bought by cousin Freddie.
1 red-haired, wrinkled, cold-nose classic basset,
Answers to BH (bitch hunter).

1 blue Coleman, 2-foot deep, drain plug, fully iced.
1 Marlin 336Y .30-30 deer buster-- uncle Chuck’s,
15 Remington jacketed hollow-points,
Gilded steel to prevent disintegration.
1 backwards Jr. Budweiser cap,
1 S-10 with trailer.

1 Bass Tracker 17.5 Pro Series--dad’s, and he’d kill.
4 for the day--Eminem, Garth Brooks, Nelly, Jay-Z.
1 freckled Robin, holding Batman’s earthworms.
3 wallet-crushed Trojans, hopeful.
2 bumper stickers--Dixie pride, G-Unit.

His crooked measure, holy tree!
For her pleasure, hoping to free.
Cold, cheap brew, sweet flying machine,
Bow-side hurl, know what I mean.
Beat dad home, stolen load,
A gangsta party on Bluegill Road.

The New Facebook Culture

When is the last time you harvested your crops? Or wrote on a friend’s wall? Or found out which Sesame Street character you are?

If you know what I’m talking about, odds are you have become one of the more than 200 million people (worldwide) to join the social-networking site Facebook.

Everyday in America people are waking up and discovering they can search for, and often find, just about anyone who wants to find someone else. If you are someone who might be interested in seeing the publicly posted pics of old classmates, play unique interactive games, or promote your business, then you are a potential Facebook customer.

And, not surprisingly, it’s appeal means big business. Though the founder is known for his young age, and the 24-year-old Mark Zuckerberg is said to be the youngest billionaire ever, Facebook is not just for kids.

According to O’Reilly Media, between May and December U.S. growth was strongest among the typical American worker (ages 26 to 59) at 46 percent.

Many may not know FB has become the most popular site in Canada. It has also grown rapidly in large part to an interesting list of big-name investors.

I joined the site about nine months ago. I heard a candidate for office had posted his religious views on his profile—views that might be considered controversial by many locals. I was curious. I soon found out that I had to be his “friend” to view his profile. Because I am/was a reporter, I wasn’t about to ask a political candidate to be my “friend.”

Soon thereafter, one of the key reasons for the popularity of the site became clear to me: people can find who they want to find, and still control what others can find out about them.

Millions of people also visit other social-networking sites, but I think Facebook has some features that separate it from the field and make it uniquely equipped to change America as we know it.

I've had pages on both (FB and Myspace), but for some reason I just don't care about my Myspace anymore. I've found, the more I’ve gotten on FB, the more I’ve found other reasons to keep visiting.

My friend Mark, who lives in Springfield, can talk to my friend Tony who lives in North Carolina, and I can comment on what they said to each other. Why? Each member has a wall, which is a virtual-public billboard. I can see messages posted on any of my friends' walls.

If I want to send a private message to a friend, I can do so through my inbox, just like any e-mail. However, if I, or Mark in my above-mentioned scenario, wish to put a post on a friend’s wall, then any of my friends or the characters involved can read and comment on the give and take.

In recent months, I’ve seen my wife become a virtual tycoon on Yoville (an animated virtual-world where you can work, decorate your home or race friends), and a bonefide agricultural phenom on Farm Town. I’ve seen pictures of new babies from high-school friends, posted a few of my own, and seen about a million request for my IQ (I think somebody is making big bucks on that deal).

Many locals on the site have seen the Vanished Pieces of Springfield. I know I’ve sent a Sammy B. Good to most of my friends. And that’s part of the hook. No matter where you are from, you can become a fan of, or at least a passive member of like-minded nostaligitians (yes, made-up word).

I asked five of my “friends” to tell me why they joined, and what they liked about the site.

Most people it seems, joined to connect with people from their past. But everyone has their own reasons.

My Sister-in-Law

“I really like Facebook, because not only have I got in touch with a lot of people from my past that I otherwise would never have talked to again, (but) it is a great way to communicate with the large number of family members who have also joined.”

Shannon said she visits everyday, and enjoys playing Mafia Wars, Farm Town and Yoville.

My wife’s friend from work

Courtney said it’s fun to personalize her profile, and let people know what she’s up to. She said she can get annoyed with many of the applications, though.

“I constantly get invited to join all sorts of games, but I just ignore 99% of them.”

And Courtney said something that I thought was very interesting.

“I'm already convinced there's no point in going to my ten-year high school reunion in a few years.”

I wonder how many others will see the need for reunions in the future.

Two friends from high school

Brian, a local college pastor, said he uses the site to connect with students.

“I like FB for what it makes capable, i.e. connecting with students easily and frequently. Beyond that, I enjoy reconnecting with old friends/acquaintances, though this reconnection is typically a brief burst of back-and-forth communications.”

Julie, a suburban-Atlanta mom, said she likes connecting with old friends, but wondered if she has too many now who can see her posts.

“I like Facebook and for sure talk to people I wouldn't otherwise talk to. Glad to hear from some people. I feel like I have too many "friends" though. Sometimes I have to keep my status updates cleaner than I normally would.”

Mom

Yeah, my mother is on there, too.

“I play the most stupid games..some I ignore but I like the quizzes. It is a good way to find out what is going on with family and friends.”

As for me, a quick glance at my profile reveals that I’m a Cookie Monster. I have to admit though, I was tempted to gear my answers towards Oscar the Grouch. Grover would have been fine too.